Our AP'ing Family

The family that is bonded together stays together

Just another normal night in our home. My husband cannot get enough love and kisses from Took and I cannot get enough of them. Whoever said that a dad cannot bond with a nursing child never experienced a moment like this. 

We started out as high school sweethearts at the age of 15. Fast forward 10 years and we were married, in love, traveling and loving our life. I had set ideas on how you should parent. You know, the standard, all parents leave their babies in the crib and the baby will cry themselves to sleep because that is what babies do. I CRINGE when I hear myself saying that over and over...as if I am rehearsing for a role that I would have in the future. As many times as I have said that sentence...it never really sat right, but I brushed it aside and figured that I would deal with it when I needed to deal with it. 

Well....we were in a position to deal with it...and you know what...we didn't want to do any of those "standards". We were faced with all of the things people have said to us, "Don't hold her all day. You will spoil her", "Put that baby down or she will expect to be held all day long", "Oh good luck breastfeeding...that never worked for me!", "Co-sleeper? Yeah ok! Better make that transition to her room soon!" and so on and so on...We are pretty laid back by nature...but expert parents we were not. We tried to find a balance between holding our baby girl all of the time and not spoiling her, yet it never felt like spoiling...how exactly do you "spoil"? We tried to find a fair balance sleep routines that met her needs, "taught her to sleep" and didn't require her to need to nurse to sleep...but it never really worked. It never felt natural...never felt right...and we tried...where our bedtime routine started an hour and a half earlier than her bedtime and it was met with sweating, crying and frustration on all 3 of our parts...not really the "learning" we wanted for our daughter. 

I used my Ergo carrier when I went shopping and never noticed anyone "wearing" their baby. I used it whenever I had things to do around the house, but broke into a sweat that I hoped I wasn't "screwing her up". Let's be honest...isn't it all of our intentions to not screw up our kids? I am not saying that if you don't practice what I preach then you are screwing up your kid...I am saying that I didn't want to screw up my child within our relationship and our family...but the weight of the world on my parenting practices and decisions...I quietly slipped on my baby carrier and went about my business...

I came across the concept of attachment parenting from an online group I was participating in and never heard of it. Is it possible that there is something different than the "norm"? Could it be that there is something out there for me? I read the "Continuum Concept" which changed the course of all 3 of our lives for the better. I realized then...that parenting from my instincts to meet the needs of my baby, who is reacting based on her instincts, was a more natural approach for our family. Peace.Quiet.Tranquility. Those were three things that were not happening and all of a sudden did. Peace, quiet and tranquility within me, my heart, my parenting, my daughter. All was right in our world. I proudly used my carrier for my daily errands and noticed more and more moms, who were probably there all along...but I was enlightened so come with me on this one, wearing their babes and I slowly entered into this new phase in my parenting from nervous-wreck-of-a-FTM to confident-semi-crunchy-evolutionary-calm-mommy and it's grande!